Guest Week? 2: Muddro Smith

"I do not regret it" is usually a statement that one will eventually regret.

Sometimes I take a look back at myself putting things together, like the parts of the plot or the clues in the mystery. Yet, though I was wise enough to forsee, I was not wise enough to recognize the truth presented by the pieces as they came together. If you've got an instinct like mine, you are a fool to ignore it. Take it from someone who knows.

My instinct has been correct and I have been ignoring it. Even my rational personal rule against intimacy with a co-worker - ignored. Now several of us are without jobs, and I can't help but feel somewhat responsible for that. The stupid things we do for love...

Conventional wisdom is this: if they cheat once, they are most likely going to do it again. Wisdom... ignored, or at least pushed into the darker parts of my mind where it would be forgotten in the shadows. It's amazing how clearly I can predict the future and how ignorantly I ignore my own wisdom.

The hardest part is knowing all the things I've said to people over the years about co-workers and cheating spouses, I said it to myself and I didn't listen. So, I guess that places me on an even field with the guests of the Jerry Springer show. I'm a hypocrite now, and I suppose I deserve this. I genuinely feel like throwing a chair.

I would have to stand under the chair and throw it straight up in order to hit who I want to throw the chair at. I would be tempted to do this if I could lift my recliner like that.

So, kids, learn this: if you're looking for a date at work, you may want to look for another job as well - just as a precaution. But, whatever you do, don't work for any place that sells a product called "The Neighborhood." Such an innocent and wholesome image is guaranteed to be stained.

That word looks like "stoned." Heh. Yeah...

"This sucks, Butthead! Change it."